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Warning Signs

You are not to blame and you are not alone

Most people know nothing about Domestic Violence or its early warning signs as it is not always easy to determine in the first stages of a relationship if one person will become abusive, or not.

Abusers may often seem wonderful and perfect initially, appear to be a kind and gentle person, and sometimes even make you feel so special, so loved, so important to them that you are unprepared when they gradually become more aggressive and controlling as the relationship continues.

As soon as you start to have questions about abuse we encourage you to call our Hotline, Don’t wait until you’re certain. If any warning signs are there, act quickly! The more deeply you become involved with an abuser, the harder it is to get out.

The following checklist may help you decide if you (or someone you know) is being abused.


  • Child covering earsGet serious too quickly about the relationship?
  • Disrespect you or speak disrespectfully about former partners?
  • Behave in an over-protective, possessive manner or become extremely jealous?
  • Isolate you or try to control what you do, who you see, who you talk to or where you go?
  • Play the blame game, nothing is every their fault, refuse to take responsibility for actions?
  • Suddenly get angry or fly into a rage? Intimidate or scare you when angry?
  • Frequently criticize you and your abilities as a spouse or partner, parent or employee?
  • Act like they do not trust you? Accuse you of cheating?
  • Monitor your computer or social media use, or suspect they track you?
  • Threaten to hurt you, your children, pets, family members, friends?
  • Destroy personal property or throw things around, or at you?
  • Make you feel afraid to disagree? Make you feel unsafe to break up?
  • Force or pressure you into having sex when you don’t want to, or perform sexually acts you don’t like, or go farther than you wish?


  • Are you constantly apologizing for your partner’s behavior, especially when you’ve been badly treated?
  • Do you feel like you are the only one who understands him/her or can help him/her?
  • Is living with your partner nerve wracking because you never know what will set him/her off?

If you answered ‘yes’ to any of these questions, you may be a victim of domestic violence. You are not to blame and you are not alone — millions (85% are women) are abused by their partners every year. In any case, you need not face domestic violence alone. You deserve help, and help is available. Call Interval House Hotline at: 860-527-0550. Spanish: 844-831-9200.